Motherf@%#ing Website

Seriously, what the fuck else do you want?

You probably build websites and think your shit is special. You think your 13 megabyte paralax-ative home page is going to get you some fucking Awwward banner you can glue to the top corner of your site. You think your 40-pound jQuery file and 83 polyfills give IE7 a boner because it finally has box-shadow. Wrong, motherfucker. Let me describe your perfect-ass website:

  • Shit’s lightweight and loads fast
  • Fits on all your shitty screens
  • Looks the same in all your shitty browsers
  • The motherfucker’s accessible to every asshole that visits your site
  • Shit’s legible and gets your fucking point across (if you had one instead of just 5mb pics of hipsters drinking coffee)

click for more Motherfucking Website.

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About steventorresramos

I have over (24) years of Computer Aided Drafting & Design experience and over (16) years of IT experience. After graduating high school I attended a Technical College and earned an Associate Degree in Drafting & Design. I then enrolled at the University of Puerto Rico where I earned an A.S. in Civil Engineering Technologies. While attending the Univ. of Puerto Rico I worked as a freelance Drafter for a variety of architects and engineers. During my senior year I began to work for the firm Planning Management & Development in Ponce, Puerto Rico. Two years later I was offered the position at Mario Corsino & Associates, which later became InterGroup a medium size Civil Engineering, Architectural and Planning firm in Bayamon, Puerto Rico. At InterGroup I became assistant chief drafter where I was responsible for 20+ drafters & civil techs, and this is also where I began my IT training. In 2000 I decided to move to St. Petersburg, FL where I was hired as CAD Manager at Advanced Engineering & Design a small Civil Engineering firm established in 1998. Currently still employed by Advanced Engineering & Design I’m now the CAD/IT Manager. I have also continued to expand my knowledge base in both the IT & CADD fields through continued training, certifications, and attending Autodesk University. I’m currently an Autodesk Certified Professional proficient in AutoCAD, Civil 3D and various other Autodesk products. I have been the President of the Tampa Bay Autodesk Users Group (TBAUG) since late 2007 and a member of Autodesk Users Group International (AUGI) since 1996. I have an A.S. Degree in Computer Networking , a Bachelors of Applied Science in Technology Management and currently finishing work on my Masters in Computer Information Systems. I’m a licensed drafter in the US Commonwealth of Puerto Rico, and a Microsoft Certified Professional. I hold certificates as a Microsoft Certified IT Professional: Server Administrator, Cisco Networking Associate Professional and Linux Administrator.
This entry was posted in Humor, Interesting, tips. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Motherf@%#ing Website

  1. Karen Vance says:

    Funny! Have you heard of Google chrome cast? Besides the PITA of bringing the pc to TV & hooking up HDMI are there any other advantages?

    (Better yet Google Fiber? I read they’ve bought 80% of all of the underground cabling in Kansas and 83% of NEW households -mostly young- do not sign up for cable or satellite TV. If I could invest I would.)

    IF I don’t chat with you, you & the family have a great thanksgiving! Take care, Karen

    Karen Vance, BA, BS [image: facebook icon]

    http://www.karenvance.com 813 232-5227

    Certified Member: National Association Of Dog Obedience Instructors Certified Trainer: Certification Council for Professional Dog Trainers Charter Member: Association of Pet Dog Trainers Canine Good Citizen and S.T.A.R. Puppy Evaluator: American Kennel Club Clicker Assessed Proficiency Level 2 With Distinction: Competency Assessment Programme Professional Pet Guild Member

    On Mon, Nov 25, 2013 at 2:46 PM, It’s my life, you’re just along for the

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